We are experiencing technical difficulties

This may sound strange, but I cannot access my blog. But yet, I can post. The theory is that the Chinese government blocks access to blogs. Still not sure why I'm allowed to post then. We'll deal with it somehow.
Anyway, all's well here in Shenzhen. The city was just named the model city for China for it's economic and health success.
I still have no idea what I'm doing when I go to the grocery store. All I can really recognize are a few packages that written in partial English and the vegetables. I think I need to ask some of the Chinese teachers to accompany me to the store to help me figure out what all these items are. It's either that or I better learn Chinese fast. And that wouldn't be such a bad idea... it might help when I want to order some food at the restaurant downstairs. On that note, the hallway smells like Chinese food. That's not a complaint, just an observation.

The People's Blog

I have arrived in Shenzhen, China to teach English to kids. The flight to Hong Kong was far too long. I think scientists need to develop teleportation. Or maybe airlines just need larger seats.
Anyway, I've been here a day now and I'm lost beyond belief. I can't really talk to anyone other than the teachers since I don't know any Chinese and the Chinese know no English. My apartment is completely empty aside from a rock-hard bed, a wood couch, and a TV... and a telephone that don't work. I better get accustomed to this place quick. Otherwise, I doubt I'll make it through the first month.
As I'm told, I won't get any real training for teaching. However, I was also told it should only take me a week or two to get used to the classroom and grow comfortable in teaching these kids as much English as possible considering the great language barrier.
I think it should go well as long as I don't try to teach Jersey English, Brooklynese, or Pittsburghese. I'm really tempted, but I know I shouldn't resort to that.

Mugshot

Will someone please tell me why Tom DeLay was smiling in his mugshot? Who the hell poses for a mugshot anyway? The man was arrested and charged and released on bail... AND HE'S SMILING! I would much rather have seen the classic Nick Nolte mugshot pose for DeLay. Guess I can only dream.

More stupid news

False information AND plagarism... this is getting out of hand.
http://www.theomahachannel.com/weather/5096316/detail.html
I think we need to teach a little more journalistic integrity and ethics. As do other countries, according to the article. Haven't these idiots ever heard of intellectual property rights? Please people, do your own work for a change. And do a good job at it.

Thank you Capt. Obvious

I don't know what to say, but "Well, duh." Just read this, it's funny.
http://www.thebostonchannel.com/news/5098058/detail.html?rss=bos&psp=news
I can't believe they really need to fund a survey to figure this out. Where do I sign up to get paid to do such pointless research?

confused by visas

I went to the Chinese embassy in New York City today to apply for my tourist visa so that I can travel to Shenzhen and acquire a Z (work) visa. I took a number that was quite confusing--it was numbers and letters. From what I could tell, the number had already passed on the boards. I stood with a lost look on my face. I guess the guy at the window in front of me noticed. He waved me over, even though there were others waiting and this was obviously not my number. I was then asked some questions about my application. I didn't know I'd be questioned right there. "What kind of editing do you do?" Huh? "It says here you are an editor, what do you edit?" Oh... mostly law. "OK" Yeah, that should tip them off that I shouldn't be trusted--I work with lawyers. "And why do you need to have this visa in seven days?" Because I'm leaving in less than two weeks. "But why?" That's when I was invited to go to China.
The whole process took ten minutes from walking through security to getting everything filled out.
I had planned to use the whole day for this. I was back on the bus for Jersey by noon. I can pick up my visa Monday. Does this mean I get a visa? And I still want to know what the little Chinese note at the bottom of my receipt means. It probably says, "Stupid American Visa." And it's probably accurate.

Welcome to the NHL, Sid

Tonight was the opening night of the new NHL season... 18 months or so in the making. I was out at the Thirsty Moose to watch the Devils-Penguins game. Why didn't I watch at home? Because you have to pay to watch games on Fox Sports. Stupid Cablevision crap.
Anyway, the Devils beat the Penguins 5-1, thanks in large part to the goaltending of Martin Brodeur. This game was the debut of Sidney Crosby--the kid who is supposed to be the next Wayne Gretzky. It was also Mario Lemieux's 40th birthday. Happy birthday, Mario. By the way, your team still looks terrible. Crosby wasn't all bad in his debut; he did have an assist on the poweplay (one of eleven powerplays of the night).
The Devils seem to have the upper hand with rookies this season. Zach Parise, the kid who led the U.S. team to the World Junior Championship, made his debut with a goal and an assist.
Both rookies were outdone by Washington Capital's newest addition Alexander Ovechkin, who had two goals on the night against Columbus.
At least there are three rookies worth watching this season. Let's just hope they continue this through this season and many to come.

Job Stuff

It appears I have a job. And it's one that pays. OK, so it doesn't pay well, but I'm alright with that. Starting in November I will be teaching English as a foreign language to 7-8 year olds in Shenzhen, China. Yes, I realize it's a communist country (really it's more like an oppressive capitalist country).
I figure the U.S. government is borrowing enough money and resources from China already, so why not cut out the middle-man and get paid directly from the source. Actually, that's not the reason why I'm doing this. I really think it would be a great experience to teach English in another country. And for some reason I enjoy Asian cultures and history.
The only problem I see is that I have to keep my commentary to myself. I enjoy criticizing governments (U.S. and others). I have a lot of problems with the Chinese government and it's recent history of oppression and human rights violations. But since I don't want to wind up in a Chinese prison, I'll have to learn to shut my mouth. Fortunately, I won't have much opportunity to voice my opinions in a class of children.
Let's just hope it all works out.

We Are... Penn State!

Penn State is now 4-0. They won their Big Ten opener against Northwestern. They shouldn't have won the game, however. Michael Robinson accounted for four turnovers (three interceptions and a fumble) in the first half. Fortunately, Northwestern only scored 13 on those turnovers. Oh yeah, Robinson also had two fumbles that PSU recovered. This game was pathetic. PSU did not deserve to win this game. Robinson had many terrible passes. Considering his first completion was to Northwestern should give everyone the hint that he can't throw the ball. Most of his passes were short or long. He couldn't seem to throw anything on target. Even that amazing game-winning touchdown was underthrown. He couldn't catch his receiver in stride. The receiver had to stop in his route to catch the ball and then dodge a tackle for the TD. This team will not compete in the Big Ten for a bowl bid if it keeps playing like this on offense. Joe Paterno needs to consider using Anthony Morelli as a starting quarterback. Obviously Robinson has no idea how to play the position--he's the second leading rusher on the team. If he wants to be a running back, let him. Let a real quarterback have a chance and maybe the offense will finally do something.

Stupidity

Are people really this stupid? Why do people believe in such idiotic consipiracy theories?
If you don't know what I'm talking about, check out this news story:
http://www.journalnet.com/articles/2005/09/23/news/local/news05.txt
Some local weatherman in Idaho believes the Japanese mafia is behind Hurricane Katrina as retribution for the atomic bomb attacks of WWII. Usually I'd say, "Don't quit your day job." But it's too late. This guy decided to pursue his stupid theory full time. How much time can you devote to lies and BS?

fun for the literati

Here's a wonderful site for anyone interested in literature (mostly beat poetry). It's the Naropa University audio archive (yeah, I'm promoting of my graduate program). Lot's of great readings are contained in it, as well as classes and lectures. I've listened to a bit of it, but there's just so much there to discover that I can't tell you where to begin. Some more interesting readings contain Amiri Baraka, Sonia Sanchez, Anselm Hollo, and Jack Collum. If I find anything to seriously recommend, I'll post it. Until then, just browse through it for yourself. Check it out. You can hear a whole lot of Allen Ginsburg and friends.
NAROPA AUDIO ARCHIVE

The Job Search

I thought I had a job lined up in Japan. I was wrong. They asked me to e-mail copies of documents (diplomas, TEFL, passport) last Saturday. Well, due to my grad school's stupidity, I had to wait until Monday to find out what was going on with my diploma. I explained the situation and sent all the other documents to Japan. Apparently that took too long. A school couldn't wait between Saturday and Monday to get documents? Well that's a load of crap.
So, now I'm looking at other teaching opportunities. These jobs are all in Japan and China. Although most are in China now because Japan doesn't seem to be hiring at this time. Fortunately, I have received two responses saying that I will be contacted for a phone interview. One is in Shenzhen (southern China) and the other is in Changchun (northeast China).
At this point it's first come, first serve. I just need an excuse to take some time out of the country and learn a second language (seeing as I gave up on Spanish some years ago). Not only that, but I don't feel like editing or proofreading anymore. Teaching sounds a little more interesting.

Over There, part II

It's getting near the end of the first season of FX's new series "Over There." After the first two episodes I didn't think much of the show--it didn't show much promise as a enjoyable entertainment (at least not up to par with "The Shield" or "Nip/Tuck"). I continued to watch the series in the expectation of viewing something compelling. It was wrong to think that.

"Over There" lacks. The actors do a fine job at protraying their stereotypical, one-dimensional characters, but that's about the only redeeming quality. The problem with the show isn't that the actors are flat or that the direction is bad (these aspects are terrific); the problem rests squarely on the writing. So far, only "Dim" has shown true emotion and character development (and this just developed in tonight's episode). The remaining characters are exactly how they were at the beginning of the series. Their emotions don't change much and neither do their attitudes and insight. Characters need to be more than one-dimensional. These people are not compelling. They are not forming what could become meaningful relationships. These characters do not create enough interest to keep viewers.

The storylines aren't much better. The first few episodes sounded vaguely like news reports. From then on the show has tried to incorporate more Iraqi life and culture--too little, too late. In tonight's episode, the crew finds $5 million dollars and debates what to do. There are ethical conversations, as well as questions of trust. Funny how this sounds a little like "The Shield" and its money train storyline. The difference being that "The Shield" slowly dealt with the money in a much more intriguing way.

Unless "Over There" can come up with some better storylines and a lot more character development, I don't see the series lasting. If I really wanted emotion to connect with the war in Iraq, I'd turn on CNN or talk to some recently returned soldiers.

As a side note: I may be a little biased in viewing this series as I have a few friends in the military--including those who have been to Iraq and are going back there.

War on Words

This is a little sickening... probably because I'm an editor. Most people I'm sure don't care much about this, but I do. I keep hearing about the disaster of Hurricane Katrina. It's terrible. It's a tragedy. But why must people call it "a terrible tragedy"? A tragedy is terrible in its own right. It is simply redundant to say terrible tragedy. Please cease this redundancy.

University Stupidity

Here's the deal: I graduated with an MFA in July. I was told that my diploma would be mailed to me within 30 days. It is now Sept. 19 and I have no diploma. I need said diploma to obtain a work permit in Japan. I called the registrar at Naropa and told them to send it to me immediately. They told me they can't. Why? It's simple really. The diplomas were all printed up and ready to get sent to the graduates. However, the new vice president of the university who was hired in July decided he wanted his name to appear on the diplomas rather than the VP who was there for the time that the students were. The diplomas all had to be reprinted. On top of this, some school official who has to sign every diploma lives in Canada. Why is he in Canada? What sort of stupidity is there in the world that one man can screw up my life so easily?
I am calling for the resignation of the vice president of Naropa. He's obviously too stupid to work in academia. And if he doesn't resign, I'd like a formal apology and tuition reimbursement. I spent $40,000 on that degree and I better have it soon.

Apologies

Yeah, I'm sorry for not posting sooner. I will write my review of Nova shortly. I've been busy with moving to NJ and job searches (any job offers out there?).
Along with that, I received troubling news about my friend's brother in Iraq--he's now in a hospital in Maryland. I typically would go off on a rant about W. but I'll save that for another time and place. In the meantime, we have to hope for the best for James.

Holy Gas Prices, Batman

I just decided to fill up my gas tank. It took me three tries to find a station with regular. It cost $2.74. The attendant said yesterday it was $2.57 and tomorrow it will be $3.03. Over $3? I'm sure glad I have a fuel-efficient Honda Civic. And it still costs me more than $20 to fill up. Sure makes me glad I moved last weekend and not this weekend.
I could add a whole political rant to this about how oil CEOs are making billions and still can't cut the price, but I'll leave that you. And remember, W gave them all another tax break.
I suggest taking the train.

Moving Rant

I just moved from Boulder, CO back to Rockaway, NJ. Why, you ask? Because the lease on my apartment was up and I didn't have a job in Boulder. So, I'm now sitting at home awaiting job offers.

Anyway, the 26 hour drive from Boulder to Jersey sucked. Fortunately my goal of getting out of Kansas on the first day worked. Too bad there was a huge thunderstorm the second day in Missouri (which apparently stretched into most of Kansas and part of Illinois). I must admit, I was bored out of my mind for most of the drive on I-70 and I-80. Why aren't there more radio stations on the highways? The most radio I got was either country or NPR. I'm not a fan of country music and I can only take so much classical music from NPR.

But it's nice to be home in a way... except for the lack of people I know and the humidity. I think I need a desert climate.

And again, if anyone has a job offer for me--preferably in writing or editing--please contact me. I really need a job. I want to go somewhere different. Pacific Northwest sounds nice. Just don't send me to Kansas.

Corporate Criticism

I have a serious gripe with a news agency in New Jersey. I received a phone call yesterday afternoon asking if I could come in tomorrow for an interview. Of course I can't, I live in Colorado for the next week. So I told the woman my situation and asked if it'd be OK for me to interview on the 29th. She said she'd get back to me because she'd have to look at the schedule. Two hours later I received this e-mail:

Matthew,

I wanted to follow-up with you regarding your application for the
Assistant Editor – See the News before the Rest of the World job.
While your qualifications are excellent, it
has been determined that there are candidates who are a better fit
for this position. Should the requirements for this job change or if
we identify other jobs, we will notify you.
Thanks again and best of luck,
John

Sorry folks, but I smell a skunk here. I don't think I'd want to work for a comany that sends out e-mails like this to potential employees whom they originally deem qualified.
So, if anyone would like to offer this writer/editor/proofreader a quality job (I'm not talking big salary, but rather respect), please e-mail me. And for other reference, my Web site has a copy of my resume.

American Psycho by Bret Easton Ellis

[Note: this is a review that I wrote a few years ago for class and recently found it in my files. Thought some readers might like to see it.]
As a novel, Bret Easton Ellis’ American Psycho is overrated. Not only that, but it is also a poor attempt at creating a work of art. I must admit that American Psycho has few — if any — redeeming qualities. The only redeeming quality I can think of is that it can be slightly humorous in its attempts at being artful. The greatest questions it raises are: how could any company consciously publish this and even then, how could it ever become so popular?

Most novels — at least the better ones — are easy to become engrossed in; this novel is not one of them. One of the reasons for this might be because I did not realize that it was a first-person narrative until the fifth page. There is also the wonderfully vivid descriptions of the appearance of everything that sounds more like an ad campaign than a story. I understand that the main character, Patrick Bateman, has an obsessive-compulsive personality and that in his high-class society image is everything, but his descriptions are excessive and boring. At one point he describes his morning routine in a five-page paragraph. I do not believe I have ever read such a long and meaningless paragraph in my life. If there is only one way to lose a reader it is by being excessively long winded. Usually when an author uses an abundance of description s/he will make it sound interesting or poetic to keep the readers’ interest; Ellis fails to do this in his approach.

The dialogue in American Psycho is not much better than the description. It is not drawn out exactly; it is simply repetitive and meaningless. For the first hundred or so pages Bateman and his friends only talk about image, restaurants, and having sex. None of these subjects are discussed tactfully or with much of a purpose. Usually dialogue is used to aid in character development, but in this case it is not necessary as all of the characters are almost identical. All of the men in the novel look similar, act similar, and have similar jobs. They are all self-centered, materialistic misogynists. Meanwhile all the women are beautiful, materialistic, and unintelligent.

In his character descriptions, Ellis fails to explain the motives for the pompous and sometimes stupid actions of the characters. He does not let the reader know of the characters’ pasts. There is also much confusion between the characters. First of all, many people call Patrick Bateman by numerous other names because he supposedly looks like ever other character. Secondly, because all the characters look and act similar, the reader has a problem remembering who is who. By doing so, he causes every main character to be unsympathetic. The only characters for whom the reader feels sympathy are the bums, waitresses, and murder victims.

Another problem I have found is that the novel is written in the present tense. I believe Ellis’ motive for this is to prevent foreshadowing and incorporate more suspense and surprise. However, I also believe that by doing so he is alienating the audience by leaving them in the dark so to speak. If Ellis’ purpose is to surprise the audience, he has failed. By portraying Patrick Bateman as an unsympathetic and almost repulsive character he evokes no emotion or surprise in the reader at the disgusting actions.

There are also some detail problems with the text. The character of Patrick Bateman is obviously obsessive-compulsive and yet he has a maid, eats out regularly, brings his blood-stained clothes to the dry cleaners, drinks heavily, and abuses cocaine. These do not connect well with an obsessive-compulsive personality. Simply with the drugs and alcohol, the character would have been dead from an overdose long ago. As for the maid and the dry cleaners, an intelligent murderer would not use either because of the threat of being caught. I understand that the maid and dry cleaners are a sort of status symbol for him, but it is just common sense that he would not use them.

One criticism of American Psycho is that it contains inappropriate graphic violence and sex. This is a valid criticism as it does contain a large amount of unnecessary graphic descriptions. The sexual content of the novel is more appropriate for an issue of Penthouse than a nationally distributed book. The graphic violence depicted seems to me to be a how-to murder and maim manual. I cannot decide whether or not this novel belongs in a library or an adult bookstore. The question is: Should this have been censored? The simple answer is “no.”

Just because this novel is disgusting and repulsive in content does not mean it should be censored on a national level. That would be defying the First Amendment rights of the author. However, the publisher of the novel should have used some discretion when considering the text. It is their job to eliminate works that do not fit their moral expectations or quality. But, since it was published it is the public’s duty to persuade people from not reading it because of its content. The best possible way to censor a work such as this is to not tell people of its violent or sexual content but rather to explain how poorly written it is. A work of this quality should not have been published simply based on the fact that it is not work of even mediocre quality. The only reason that this novel sold as many copies as it has is because people protested its publication and labeled it pornography. As right as these protesters were, they neglected to state that the novel was also poorly written. Simply by declaring a book disgusting, vulgar, or pornographic, etc. causes people to read it because “they want to know why it is disgusting, vulgar, etc.”